After maybe 10 years~

After waking up in a killer hunger and realizing that there's no food in the entire apartment and that going out in that stupid blizzard really isn't an option this early I needed to dig in to the survivor pack we still haven't sent to Laku in Osaka.

So rasberry-flavored porridge it is :D

StupidFox *_____*

モイモ～イ！！

On a happier note~

ABS + new PV = eternal love



Words can't describe how insanely happy this made me!! ありがとう!!

*sigh*

Lately everything has been on a blah-mode yet again. Nothing I can do interests and everything I can't is beyond interesting........

People don't seem to care being in contact with me and if I do hear about someone it just seems to piss me off royally even though it might not be something to get biased about. Even people who really don't annoy me start to annoy me because I read too much in to text messages, the lack of them or the way people talk to me..... I've come to think it's just because I think that everyones lives revolve around me. Basically because of that.

It hasn't been this bad for a while now so I guess it was to be expected, right? (My "for a while" meaning something like a few weeks mind you.)

I'm reading this guys blog (http://iselfharm.blogspot.com/) and it really made me think about myself, way too much for my liking actually... See his going to a shrink at one point (because of his self harming and while there realizes some pretty important things) and I just can't help but to think about my own way of seeing people and the way everyone treats/looks/talks about/to me.

I've been reading my old xanga from way back (starting from the early 2004 I think) and it isn't helping my current mood that I've been so melancholy back then as well. I don’t know if I should really go talk to someone about my dragging mood and the general down look I have on life, would it help? It just sucks that even though I do have good days too I tend to forget then in the blink of an eye and just dwell in the negative things.


Here's a little copy+pasteing, see what I mean?

March 2006.
As you might have guessed (if you read this whole thing) I'm feeling a bit down.. It seems to be my general mood these days.. I hate this 'cos I really don't know why I am like this all the fucking time ._." I only seem to listen to mellow, melancholic music and all those sad news kinda take the light off my good news as well…

December 2005.
Why is everything so boring? I need a life..

November 2005.
10 YEARS AGO I:
was 9 years old, just started 3rd grade and my English-lessons, I was the kid everyone kinda.. picked on for one reason or another. liked to read books (I usually went to the library, borrow some books and walked home ~1km reading the first book on the way)

5 YEARS AGO I:
was 14, started junior highschool a year, had stopped studying German, hated my best friend for being a bitch, all heavy metal, had had my first big crush on this "kewl" skater boy who was in my class, hoped for a better life, got my first piercing, lost a friend but got her back. was still being picked on (mostly by these "cool" girls who didn't understand why guys liked my company.. who says guys and girls can't be JUST friends?)

1 YEAR AGO I:
was 18, thought life'd get better when I turn 18; got my drivers license, got to go to bars etc. but to tell the truth, nothing changed that much. Had lost contact with "my best friend" and still hated her guts, was way too deep in JROCK and dreamed about gigs and trip to Japan, went to my first real concert: KoRn

YESTERDAY I:
was at work as usual, got mad at my employee, felt strangely.. hollow at night and didn't get sleep. thought about Mucc and how I'd really like to see them again. was eagerly waiting for today because wee came to Rovaniemi to visit our big sister Miia ^^;

July 2005
So, I am alive after all. I noticed that no-one is really interested whether I'm writing or not…

Ice ice baby....

Waking up with a frozen hand and after sleeping with 3 heavy blankets on isn't too much fun I tell ya!!

Cute naa~

Time for a little nap

Woke up super early today!

Watched Toy Story but now my head is aching so the title says it all.

Oh yeah. 'The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus' was amazing *___* if I would have to describe it with just one word, it'd be 'Dali'. Heath Ledger was fantastic and I don't think they could've picked 3 more suitable actors to finish the story than Jude Law, Johnny Depp and Colin Farrel. I'm still laughing at Johnny, Jude is such a perfect sleazeball and Colin the bad boy!

Also 'Sherlock Holmes' was fabulous even though I waited nothing less than that :) and Jude Law as Watson!! The 'stache <3 and Robert Downey Jr. as the man himself.... I can see that he put a lot of his own experience to his acting (mainly the drinking part....) but I do like my men a little on the loopy side, heh.

Well. "To the infinity and beyond!"

Come to Finland?

One little gig for us Finns too? Pretty please...

Rise against.

Long time no nothing, sorry about that u_u

Nothing much has happened since my unexpected little hiatus... Expect a few things.

Our internet was down for good 3 months since neither our provider nor our landlord "knew" anything about it and no one bothered to offer any frikkin help....

Sirian stayed at our place the whole of December since she got to move in to her new apartment in the beginning of this month.

And we got a Nintendo Wii as a Xmas present, bought Guitar Hero: Metallica for it and I've now played thru all the songs ^^"

Also I think we're fighting with Sanna (again, big surprise there huh?) or at least she is *sigh* dunno what to do with her anymore and this whole situation irks me to no end because (as I've said it before and propably will do so again in the future) it is NOT always our job to make everything better and even this time we don't even really know what the fuck this is all about!! I'm just seriously getting t ired of this shit... all the time.

Hmm... what else? Miia and Jarno bought a new house up at Rovaniemi and they'll be moving there soon. I want to move away from this rathole of an apartment! Once again our rent is rising, it's the second time since we moved here and when another 15€ may not sound so bad.... yup. So maybe we'll start looking for a cheaper and better apartment even thoug it'll also mean a smaller one.

Tomorrow we're going to take Sirian to the movies! It's SuperPäivät so we're going to see the Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus and after that the premiere of Sherlock Holmes. Oh the decadence of spending~

Well, I'll leave you with that fine gentleman up there and head to catch some z's.